What no one tells you about expat life until you live it
Living abroad isn’t just about learning—it’s also about the things I had to unlearn after moving to Europe..I didn’t fully realize how many quiet assumptions I carried until I had to let them go, one by one. Living in Denmark, Portugal, and through many slow travels across Europe has humbled, reshaped, and ultimately freed me in unexpected ways.
If you’re thinking about making the leap, or already adjusting abroad, here are ten things I had to unlearn—and maybe you will too.
1. Bigger Isn’t Always Better
Back home in Asia, I grew up believing that more space, more stuff, and more convenience meant you were moving up in life. A big house was a status symbol. A large family car meant you were doing well.
But in Europe, minimalism is often a lifestyle—not a compromise. Small apartments, efficient public transport, and “just enough” are not only accepted but often preferred. It’s about living smarter, not larger.
📍 Living in a 45 sqm apartment in Lisbon taught me how little space I actually needed.
👉 Thinking of downsizing abroad? Here’s what moving to Portugal really looks like.
2. You Don’t Have to Work Yourself to the Bone
Coming from a hustle culture, I wore burnout like a badge. In Europe? Taking breaks is not lazy—it’s expected.
In Denmark, people leave work at 4 PM. In Portugal, lunch breaks are sacred. Vacation days? Taken. Fully. No shame.
I had to unlearn that constant productivity equals worth.
3. Being On Time Means Being Early (or Late—Depending Where You Are)
German train leaves at 12:07? It will.
Portuguese plumber says “Tuesday”? Might be next week.
Time in Europe is elastic—and culturally contextual. I used to stress over punctuality, now I carry flexibility in one hand and a book in the other.
🧭 Tip: Download DB Navigator and CP Portugal for train schedules that (mostly) run on time.
4. Healthcare Doesn’t Have to Bankrupt You
One of the biggest shocks? Affordable healthcare that works.
In Portugal and Denmark, I paid under €10 for a doctor visit. Prescriptions cost less than a dinner out.
No endless paperwork. No $300 surprise bills.
🩺 Curious about how healthcare works in Europe? Here’s a guide by Expatica.
5. Tipping Isn’t Obligatory
It took me weeks to stop reflexively tipping 20%. In most of Europe, service charges are included, and a small tip is seen as a polite bonus—not a requirement.
💡 Rule of thumb: Round up or leave 5–10% max. In Portugal, locals often just leave coins.
6. Convenience Isn’t Always the Priority
Stores close early. Offices shut down by 4 PM. Sundays? Everything’s closed.
At first, it felt like an inconvenience. Then I realized: Europeans value time off more than 24/7 access.
I had to unlearn my addiction to convenience and embrace planning—and patience.
7. Speaking Louder Doesn’t Help Anyone Understand You
I used to think speaking louder made up for not knowing the local language. It doesn’t.
What does help? Learning a few basic phrases, being polite, and using tools like Google Translate.
🗣️ In Denmark, even though nearly everyone speaks English, making an effort in Danish (even a “Tak!”) earns instant respect.
8. Socializing Isn’t Always Spontaneous
Europeans often build friendships slowly and intentionally. Don’t expect an invite after one good conversation.
I had to unlearn my “oversharing = bonding” mindset and embrace quality over quantity.
That said, expat groups, co-working spaces, and hobby clubs make it easier to find your people.
📌 New here? Read: Living in Denmark Without Speaking Danish – How Far Can You Really Go.
9. You Can Have a High Quality of Life Without Earning 6 Figures
In many parts of Europe, a modest income stretches further. Public transit is reliable, education is often free, and walkable cities reduce daily expenses.
My lifestyle improved—not because I earned more—but because I spent smarter and lived slower.
🛤️ Curious about where to live affordably? Check out these small European towns perfect for digital nomads.
10. Life Isn’t a Race
One of the Hardest Things I Had to Unlearn was the need to rush everything—success, relationships, travel, even meals.
Europe taught me to linger: at the table, in conversations, during walks.
Now, I savor espresso instead of gulping coffee. I take lunch breaks. I give myself permission to be where I am.
Living abroad doesn’t just teach you about a new culture—it asks you to re-meet yourself.
✨ Final Thoughts
Moving to Europe didn’t just shift my address—it rewired my perspective. I had to let go of ingrained habits, values, and expectations that no longer served me.
If you’re planning your move abroad, don’t just pack your bags—prepare to unpack your mindset.
💬 Your Turn
What did you have to unlearn after moving abroad?
Are you still adjusting—or considering making the move?
👇 Drop your story in the comments—or share this with someone who’s just starting their journey abroad.
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